by Frank Neale (MC08)

I suspect we all find summer holidays to be a good time for a spot of quiet reflection away from the office. Whilst I was away a friend asked me, “What are the common themes of your coaching?” This set me thinking and I thought I would share the results, just in case they strike a chord with you.

1. Inner confidence: Whilst most people in our industry show outer confidence they do not always feel it inside and this can hold them back. Whatever the specific coaching goals most of our clients feed back to us that they feel more confident in themselves after the coaching mainly, we suspect, because of their greater self awareness and understanding of others and as a result of reframing situations. They also feel more energised.
2. Presence/gravitas: This comes up a lot, particularly with mid level professionals as well as newly appointed portfolio company directors. Using a simple model of leadership presence most of our clients get feedback from their sponsors that their presence has significantly improved.
3. Listening skills: The most common shortfall almost all of our clients, and probably the world in general, is relatively underdeveloped listening skills. Using Nancy Kline’s “Time to Think” we find that improved listening is often a significant factor in our clients achieving their goals.
4. Interpersonal relationships: During the coaching conversations it often emerges that our clients have a difficult relationship with someone on their team; often their boss, of course! Through the use of instruments such as Myers Briggs, reframing situations and uncovering self limiting beliefs the client is usually able to see the relationship in a new more workable light.
5. Moving on up: Clients often come to realise that what got them to where they are today may not serve them well in their future path. Within the private equity profession this is often about becoming more of a team player rather than a dedicated pursuit of their own brand. Similarly newly appointed chief executives learn that humility and vulnerability can be very useful in their new role whereas up until now they have generally masked such traits thinking them to be potential weaknesses.
6. Importance of good feedback: People who are willing to engage in coaching are keen to receive feedback as this is how they learn. Throughout the coaching process we encourage sponsors to give positive feedback when they notice changes in behaviour that the client is seeking to attain. Even more valuable is the feedback clients give themselves by keeping a self reflective learning journal.

Frank Neale’s latest musings (BC08)

I recently completed a 5 day walk with my youngest son along the SW Coastal Path through Devon-from Lyme Regis almost to Dartmouth. I say almost as our goal was Dartmouth but we did not quite make it as we had not realised how difficult the very last section was and how long it would take. If we had been persistent we would have missed our last train back to London. In the light of this reality we therefore amended our goal. Along the way we had some very strenuous sections and some others where there was plenty of time to take in the superb views along the Jurassic Coast, a UNESCO World Heritage site. We veered off the path once in the wrong direction but not for long as close attention to compass and map soon got us back on course. I kept a journal as we walked and have distilled my thoughts on the obvious metaphor with business coaching and goal setting in particular. Seven always seems a good number so here goes:

1. Set yourself a big “hairy” goal – you might not make it all the way but you sure will be nearer to it than when you started out
2. Have some more immediate sub-goals on the way as that helps to motivate you that you are achieving something
3. Good planning is essential – we only thought in terms of miles per day rather than difficulty per day and therefore overstretched on one day
4. Remain flexible – it does not matter if you do not quite make it first time. You can always keep on trying
5. Check where you are at all times – if you make a mistake or veer off plan check out quickly if the detour is worthwhile – if not go backwards and get back on plan
6. Remain “present” i.e. alert and aware at all times so that you can enjoy the journey and avoid the mantraps (in our case the views, flora and fauna and the dog poo!)
7. Reassess your goals against current reality – determination and persistence are generally thought of as strengths but if taken to extremes they can equal stupidity.